For the Optimizers

4am: Wake up

4:05am: Drink 64 oz of water. Done for the day. 

4:10am: Meditate. Cold Plunge. Sauna. Feeling temperature confused and stressfully zen.

4:12am: Coffee. Just kidding. You’re so filled with purpose (the need for external validation; dad?) 

You don’t need it.

4:12am (really): The greatest HIIT workout of all time that you found on instagram. No recovery meal because you’re obviously fasting.

4:15-7am: Content time. Tik Toks and Reels for the #algo

7am: Emails. Block 2 hours each morning. Answer literally one per day. “Where does the time go?”

9am-8pm: Work meetings. Show up incrementally later and later to each one until the last one gets pushed. 

No food or water. Bathroom? Never heard of it. 

Bladder = optimized.

Living. The. Dream.

Systems! We love them.

They help us #hustle and #grind.

To get ahead of the competition.

To live our dream life.

Or so we think.

My question to all the optimizers out there.

When does it all become too much?

Please do not get me wrong (even though I know there will be flack for this post, whatever)

I love a good routine.

I have mine. (Almost) Every morning and every night.

The consistent actions I take to help feel accomplished. 

On pace.

In sum – they help me feel like ME.

However, these mundane routines have a point of restriction that cannot be ignored.

The constant “No”s to events and gatherings.

Missing out on spending quality time with friends and family.

Many times, forcing your hand into making a decision.

Is it worth the stress and guilt?

Sitting on the sidelines, working on work that will ultimately be there for you tomorrow.

Instead of connecting. With yourself. With others.

Where is the spontaneity? 

The serendipity?

Is it planned?

Orchestrated?

Does that even count?

This is where the grinders and optimizers stop reading. They’ll tell themselves I have it all wrong. That I’ll never be “successful” because I value the wrong things.

Maybe that’s true.

Maybe I’m too easy on myself.

Maybe I'll never get there.

Wherever “there” is (up to you).

But I know as long as I’m doing what I feel is right for me, that I’ll be ok.

And that means occasional late nights.

Missing a workout here or there.

Making an effort to see friends on a week night even though I know I’ll get less sleep.

I used to consistently shut those offers down.

I “couldn't” because it would “impact my performance”

And you know what? I was performing just fine at work at the start.

But eventually, the loneliness crept in.

Isolation for the sake of optimization 

Just made everything more difficult.

So now, I welcome those nights. Because the connection and memories are worth it.

And I feel more free.

I’m no longer tied to arbitrary routines and tasks that add and take away.

I still love my routine. But I also love breaking them for the people and the activities I love…

A friend I respect once told me “If it’s not a ‘fuck yes’ then it’s a ‘no” 

And I’ve lived by that notion since.

So, If you’ve made it this far

I’ll leave you here to reflect.

Ask yourself this:

What truly fills you up? Allows you to be the best you?

Where are you unnecessarily strict? (If at all)

Where can you tighten up? 

Are you saying yes to less than a “Fuck yes”?

Let me know what you come up with.